Week 9- Question 1

Which pattern (rigid complementarity, competitive symmetry, or submissive symmetry) do you think would be the most difficult to change? Why? Which would be the most damaging to a relationship? Which would be the most potentially damaging to the self-esteem of the individuals involved?


The pattern that would be the most difficult to change to me would be submissive symmetry and competitive symmetry. But i would moreover choose submissive symmetry because it’s very hard to become decisive over night. I’m very laid back and I know sometimes I can be really submissive and just go with what other people want to do pertaining to going out or extra circular activities. Whenever you ask a submissive person what they want or want to do they are thinking about other factors like; what the other person wants to do, if they would approve or if the other person has a better idea.

A pattern that could be the most damaging to a relationship would be competitive symmetry because having to strong headed people in one relationship will have a lot of conflict pertaining to any situation. The conflict would arise because in perspective there are two opinions trying to be victorious. Both fighting for the one-up position can help encourage but ultimately there will be stress and "loser," and that causes unhappiness on one partner.

Rigid complementarity would be the most damaging to self-esteem of individuals involved because one person making all the decisions and taking control of everything can make people angry and upset. Tempers are more likely to arise and if it hasn't already then there could be pent up animosity between partners. In the end all that animosity could be the reason of depression or be the breaking point of a relationship. This could make the one-down partner role feel worthless or make them question their self-worth.